Ask yourself, "What causes my insecurity?"

You worry about how you look or if you are good-looking enough. You worry that you're either too fat or too skinny. You worry that other people might not like your new hairstyle.You worry about how dark or white your skin tone is. You worry that you might fail. 

Do you know why you worry so much? Because YOU WORRY ABOUT WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK ABOUT YOU. You worry about failing to reach the society's standard. You worry not to satisfy everyone's expectation. You worry about not getting many likes and retweets on social media because you feel like it's an approval or validation of your worth. You worry too much to the extent that you forgot to prioritize your happiness. 

There isn't person amongst us who doesn't have insecurities. They are just better at handling them or hiding them. 

Are you brave enough to overcome your insecurities? Do you have courage to find your peace and contentment within yourself? If so, let's start!

1. The Hindrances

To deal with insecurity means to deal with the obstacles that you must face in order to succeed. It means to deal with the old wounds that have never healed.

Here are some hindrances:
 
First is "THE PAST", wherein some of you were criticized or some of you were bullied. And those words they have said stayed in your mind. Some of you might think that it's been healed because time have passed but still, they may never go away

 Second is, "NEGATIVE IMAGE", after you heard all those negative words over the years, you start thinking ill of yourself too. You start having unfavorable comparison of yourself to others that results in having a negative image of yourself in you mind. We are all made beautiful but with that negative image of you that is ugly, dumb and failure, you act accordingly. 

Third is, "NEEDING APPROVAL", having someone's approval is great. You feel beautiful and valued. But you tend to do everything that everyone says because you want their approval. You fear not getting the approval because the feeling of being valued will go away.

Fourth is, "SOCIAL MEDIA", you compare yourself to those hot people you see on Facebook and Instagram. You make yourself insecure by wanting to be like them or to be as good as them.

Fifth is, "LACK OF SELF-APPRECIATION", you tend to reject large part of yourself. You don't like what you are seeing in the mirror because you have pimple, or you have anything wrong with your body. You failed to see your inner self that is unfearful. You failed to accept that everyone has imperfections.

Finally, what is the key to deal with insecurities?

Here's the tea: The hindrances we encounter is actually the key!

You should learn to start embracing the obstacles and start working on them. You should start to acknowledge your imperfections by working on them and not by dragging yourself down.

Here's what you should do:

1. Forgive but not forget the past.

Recognize all those words that they have said, then start to forgive them slowly. Undestand that they were driven by their own demons, but do not forget their words for it will help you to be a better version of yourself. Let the past go, one step at a time. You got this. 

2. Accept yourself.

Try to pause and take a look on yourself. Have self-assesment and reflect. Notice your whole self, both your body and your inner self, that you dislike. Then think about a flawed friend or family of yours. Think about how you'd treat this imperfect person. Like the flawed person in your life, your flawed self also deserves love. Give yourself compassion and assurance. Embrace every part of you. See the beauty of your imperfections for they make what you are and you are wonderful. Love yourself first before you start giving love to others. Because you cannot give what you don't have. 

3. Self-approval is enough as a validity.

If you notice yourself wanting someone's approval, their praises, the likes and the retweets, do yourself a favor by replacing that with self-approval. You don't need anyone else's approval but your own, that's how powerful you are. Don't let others terrorize your life by letting them control you. Accept yourself. Love yourself. That's all you need.

4. Stop comparing.

Comparison of yourself with others in terms of how they look, how happy they are, how much money is in their bank account, where they're travelling... it's never useful comparison because it harms you. Instead of comparing your life to them, start making them as an inspiration. That one day, you'll be as great as them or maybe better than them. You are on a different path than others and only you can take control. Wish them good but see their goodness as different from yours.

5. Trust in yourself.

After all you've been through, start to develop a habit of trusting yourself that you'll be okay. Develop a habit of trusting what's happening that it will unfold and everything would fall into the right places. That one day, you'll have peace and contentment. One day, you'll smile without pretending.

This path would be messy. One day, it will feel like you're okay but on the other day, you'll feel like you're back to zero. You will find the things you are struggling with and you start working on them. But above all, this is a good path for it will help you find your self. You can do it, step by step. I believe in you.