I rarely tries swimming. Maybe it's not just really a part of our family activities. Aside from we're living far from bodies of water, the travel is expensive and we're not rich. Resorts are expensive for us too. Swimming feels like a luxury for us.

I can tell that's somehow is my excuse for not having any swimming skills. It might also be the reason why, for the first time when someone treated us to a Resort, made me feel so excited. Since I was too young back then, I   admit how hilarious I am thinking that swimming was just an easy peasy. Being in a low level part of the water makes me confident of my abilities. Only that when I saw people going to the deeper part and I bite on the temptation to follow them. 

As far as I remember, that's how it happened. I was clinging to someone since I can't really swim, but she haven't noticed how I was pushed and was directly submerged in the water. It was a clear memory for me. I can clearly remember how I feel slowly like pulled down by an invisible force and gasping for air, while waters were filling my stomach. I can clearly remember the white tiles of the pool and how my adrenaline pushed me to do a "do or die" decision. With all the forced I've mustered up that second, I've quickly kicked on the tiles to push myself upward. I have able to cling to someone and spit the water I've drank. That moment I thought I'd be totally drowned but I'm not, and yes, no one have an idea what really happened. As I grew up, I thought that was just a one of the funny experience I have, a memory to only laugh at. Yet as I've tried visiting resorts with my friends, and learning how to swim, I have no idea how that memory can feel like surreal happening again underwater. I want to try staying underneath like what my friends are doing, I want to play with them, to find the coins thrown in the pool but I can't. That old memory is haunting me and sometimes it nearly makes me wanna cry.

That childhood experience restricted me from a certain capability. Be that as it may, it have marked something more in my soul. It was one of the top experience that taught me how to overcome life's battle.

The trying times will pull us down, submerge us, and drown us. Most of the time, people around us just can't help us. They're not aware of our struggles, but we are. It's only us who can push ourselves up. It's only us who can truly save our life.

So if you're in a difficult situation right now and you feel like life is trying to drown you, I hope you find, and muster the force to push yourself up and breathe. There's a wonderful life above that pool. There's a sun shining. All you have to do is to save yourself cause no one can do it for you.

Love and peace. Good day!

Stay healthy and safe<3 Strictly follow quarantine rules please!